The Vicious Circle of Life
by annoyingfan1224
Summary: Two teams. One war. Four African mammals. It can only mean chaos and endless laughs. Find out what happens when Simba and the hyenas are thrown into the world of of Team Fortress 2.
1. Special Delivery

The alarm rang loudly throughout the RED team's base, a sound that was quickly replaced by the sound of the mercenaries groggily emerging from their slumber.

"Aw, man," said Scout, scratching his back and stretching, "I feel like I'm moving in slow-motion here."

"Speak for yourself, mate," replied Sniper, pulling on his shoes, "I feel dead. Let me tell you, I'd feel more awake if I actually were dead."

"Come on, ladies, this is no time for casual conversation," barked Soldier, already fully dressed, "You'll have plenty of time to wake yourselves up at breakfast." Soldier led the rest of the men to the mess hall, where Demoman had already gotten himself a large plate of pancakes and a bottle of whiskey.

"Demoman," said Spy, sitting next to the Scotsman, "please tell me you're not going to pour that whiskey on those pancakes."

"Hey, I didn't have a problem with you putting cigarettes on your birthday cake instead of candles now did I," Demo retorted.

"I remember that," said Engineer, chuckling slightly, "He blew all but one out and smoked the last one." The rest of the mercenaries laughed at the memory, even Spy.

"Er, Engineer," whispered Medic, "I believe the mail has arrived."

"Thanks, Doc," Engineer replied, standing up to face the others.

"Alright fellas, it's the moment of truth. Now we all know that when the mail comes, someone's gotta go out and get it. The question is, who's it gonna be?"

"Say no more, Engie," said Soldier, standing as well, "I volunteer myself and Pyro to retrieve the post." Pyro quickly stood up and mumbled something that sounded like 'why me?'

"Because," Soldier responded, "Metaphorically, I am the American Spirit, and you are the burning passion inside of me." The other men gave Soldier a strange look.

"Uh, that came out wrong. No matter. Let's go!" The two mercs left the mess hall and walked to the only mailbox, which was about 10 meters from the base. Soldier opened the mailbox and removed its contents.

"Let's see now," he said, "We've got a letter for Demoman, a package for Medic, and two issues of Playbrony for Scout and Spy." Pyro tapped him on the shoulder and pointed to a large crate about 20 feet away. Soldier walked to the crate and examined it.

"Who do you suppose this is for," he asked his fire-loving acquaintance. Pyro just shrugged. He wasn't sure who would order something as big as this. Without warning, a loud banging noise came from inside the crate.

"Ah, must be for Sniper then," Soldier remarked, "Someone must have sent him an animal from his homeland as a reminder of what he's fighting for." Pyro looked at him and mumbled something that sounded like 'are you sure?'

"Well, I highly doubt they'd send a live person," Soldier replied in a sarcastic tone. The banging sound continued and the crate started shaking and fidgeting like Scout during a crying fit after seeing a rainbow. The two mercenaries stepped back cautiously. Finally, the lid of the crate was violently torn off, and out jumped one of the biggest lions Soldier and Pyro had ever seen. The lion glared at them and growled under his breath.

"See? Told you it was for Sniper," Soldier proudly declared, "After all, lions are native to Australia, right?" Pyro placed a gloved hand on his mask in bewilderment at Soldier's stupidity. The lion, not happy about being ignored, let out a mighty roar that nearly knocked over the two men.

"Alright, O'Malley," Soldier roared back, "I don't like you, and I'm assuming that you don't like me! And if you wanna tussle, then you better be ready for the fight of your life!" The lion snarled and swiped at Soldier with a large paw. Soldier backed away and let out a less than manly yelp.

"If that's how it's gonna be," Soldier said, regaining his composure, "Then you leave me no choice but to act on Plan B. Running away and screaming." With that, Soldier ran back to the base, screaming like a little girl. Pyro took one look back at the lion, whose deadly gaze was locked on him.

"Run," the lion simply stated. Not taking time to wonder how a lion could speak English, Pyro took his advice and quickly followed after Soldier. The lion watched them as they ran from him, his mouth curving into a slight grin.


	2. Cat's Got a Tounge

It had been ten minutes since Soldier and Pyro went out to get the mail, and the other teammates were getting impatient.

"Sheesh. What's taking them so long," asked Scout.

"I'm honestly not surprised," replied Spy, "Considering their intelligence levels." Finally, Soldier and Pyro ran into the mess hall and stopped to catch their breath.

"Well, there you are, fellas," Engineer said, "Where you been all this time?" Soldier was nearly out of breath, but answered anyway.

"Mail…crate…lion…attacked…ran…screamed…here," he said.

"So," Medic began, "You went outside to retrieve the mail, found a crate with a lion inside of it, which attacked you, so you ran away and screamed, and now you're here?" Soldier just nodded. Pyro mumbled something and the team burst into laughter.

"A talking lion, eh, Pyro," Demo asked jokingly, "Are you sure the fumes from that mask haven't gone to your head, lad?"

"Look, I'm sure ya'll were just half-asleep and dreamed this," Engineer stated, "But if you want, we can all go out and take a look together."

"Anything to get you maggots to believe us," Soldier replied. The other six mercenaries reluctantly followed the men out of the mess hall and to the mailbox, where the crate lay baking in the sun.

"There it is," Soldier declared, "Approach with caution."

"It can't be that bad," Spy remarked, "Let me take a look." He walked to the crate, looked inside, and let out a terrifying scream.

"What is it, Spy," asked Heavy, genuinely worried.

"It's absolutely terrible," Spy shrieked, "It's inhuman! It's…It's…EMPTY!" Spy turned the crate so everyone could see the inside and began laughing, the other teammates joining him.

"The reason it's empty," Soldier said in a slightly annoyed tone, "is because the lion jumped out of the crate when it attacked us."

"Well, where is it now," asked Scout.

"In the back of their imaginations," Spy joked, "that's where." The team laughed again. Unnoticed by the others, Heavy had stopped laughing, and looked towards a rock about 15 feet away.

"What's wrong, Heavy," asked Sniper.

"I thought I heard something," he replied.

"It was probably nothing," said Engie, "Come on, let's head back and finish breakfast." The mercenaries began to follow the Texan, all except for Heavy, who began walking toward the rock. As he approached the rock, he heard the sound again, this time more clearly.

"Who is there," he asked. After receiving no answer, Heavy slowly peeked behind the rock, his eyes widened in surprise as a large furry object came into view. Suddenly, there was a loud roar and a blur of movement. The other mercenaries, hearing the roar, turned toward the rock where it came from.

"What the heck was that," asked Scout.

"That was the lion we were telling you about," Soldier replied, "I think it got Heavy!"

"Come on," shouted Demoman, "There's no time to lose! We've got to make sure he's okay!" The eight mercenaries ran to the rock and found an interesting sight. Heavy was holding a full-grown lion by its neck, about a foot off the ground.

"I would prefer that you did not do that," Heavy said to it.

"Back of our imaginations, huh," Soldier said, elbowing Spy.

"Put him down, Heavy," Medic commanded, "You're hurting him." Heavy dropped the lion onto the ground and watched as it coughed, trying to regain its breath.

"So this lion can talk, huh," Scout said sarcastically. Pyro nodded. He knew what he heard.

"Well, then," Scout continued, "let's see if he'll talk now." Scout got down on one knee in front of the lion, who was sitting upright.

"Yo, Simba," Scout began, not realizing the significance of the name, "What year did Shakespeare write Hamlet?"

"I don't know," the lion replied, much to the surprise of the others, except Scout, "And how did you know my name?"

"See," Scout said, standing and turning to face the team, "This lion is way too dumb to- HOLY CRAP!" Scout jumped away from the lion in surprise after realizing what he just heard.

"D-did anyone else just hear that," he asked, his voice shaking slightly. The others nodded. The next few minutes consisted of silence and awkward staring until Simba finally spoke up.

"So," he said casually, "You guys mind telling me where I am?"

"Yeah, sure," Soldier replied in a suspicious tone, "As soon as you tell us how you got here."

"How I got here, huh? Hm, where to begin?"


	3. The King and We

"And just a few days ago, I was out minding my own business, when I got hit with some kind of dart that knocked me out cold. When I woke up, I was in that crate, with no idea as to where I was. I swear, when I get my claws on whoever brought me here, it won't be pretty."

"Well, now's your chance," said Soldier, pointing to Sniper, "I have reason to believe that this man has requested that you be brought here."

"For the last time," replied Sniper, a trace of exhaustion in his voice, "I didn't request anything, and lions don't come from Australia." For the past few hours, the mercenaries had been listening to Simba's life story and how he became king of his homeland. It was only a half an hour until noon, and the team was back in the mess hall along with Simba, who looked like he had never been indoors before.

"Sure is cold in here," he remarked.

"Well, yeah, we've got the air on 'cause it's hot outside," said Scout, "But I guess you like it hot where you're from, huh?"

"Yeah," Simba answered, "Speaking of which, when do you think I'll get back?"

"We're not exactly sure about that, Simba," Engineer told him, "but once our boss gets here, we may have an idea of how long you'll be here."

"Not too long, I hope. I've got family back home."

"We all do, partner. We all do." Suddenly, the mess hall doors burst open, making the entire team jump and Simba dive under the table. When the dust cleared, the mighty Saxton Hale stood in the doorway, light glistening off of his physique.

"Alright, hippies," he addressed the men, "where's this lion you've been blabbering about?"

"Down here," Simba called from underneath the table. He had yet to understand the ways of these people.

"He's over here, Helen," Saxton told The Administrator, who had just walked in, "What do you think we should with him?" Helen knelt on the floor so she could get a better look at Simba. After carefully examining him, she stood up.

"Do you have the crate he came in," she asked. Saxton nodded.

"Then the best thing to do is find out who captured him in the first place, then maybe we can convince them to return him to his natural habitat. He'll have to stay here until then."

"Wait, we have a mission tomorrow," said Spy, "What do we do with him then?"

"You should be grateful that it was your team that found him," Helen answered, "as it appears you now have a great advantage over the BLU Team. After all, I highly doubt they have a real predator on their side.

"How about it, Herr Simba," asked Medic, "Would you be interested in killing tomorrow?"

"I wouldn't mind killing things," Simba replied crawling out from under the table, "considering I've done it plenty of times before. But for now, I could really use a nap." Just like that, Simba collapsed onto the ground and fell asleep.

"You'd better move him, Mr. Hale," Helen said to the large Australian, "I don't want anyone tripping over him." Without much effort, Saxton flung Simba over his shoulder and tossed him into a random bedroom.

"Well then," she said to the mercs, "Enjoy the rest of your day off," and exited the mess hall.

Later that night, Scout walked into his bedroom to get some sleep after the long day, only to find Simba already lying on his bed.

"Dude," he said, "What are you doing in my room?"

"This is where that strong guy threw me after I fell asleep," Simba answered, "and I've been lying here ever since."

"Whatever," replied Scout, too tired to care, "You mind making room?"

"Not at all," Simba responded, and moved so Scout had a place to lie down. Scout pulled off his shoes and socks and got into his bed, turning his back to Simba.

"G'night," Simba said.

"Yeah, sure," Scout replied, and the two let sleep take them over.

"You better not snore."

*pffffrrrrt*

"You have gotta be frickin' kidding me."


	4. Secret Weapon

Engineer watched as the BLU Scout was blown to pieces by his sentry, and then quickly reloaded it in case there were any more oncoming attackers. Luckily, the sewers were silent, minus the footsteps of the RED Scout running to the Dispenser that stood in the corner. The fight had been going on for about ten minutes, and both teams showed signs of potential victory.

"How we doing so far," Engineer asked as he began setting up a teleporter, "Haven't seen many BLUs come down this way."

"Pretty good, actually," Scout replied, "But we gotta step up our game, like, right now. We're at match point both ways here, and pretty soon they're gonna announce-"

"Sudden death," said the Administrator's voice, echoing throughout the industrial tunnels.

"Well then," Engineer said, "Looks like it's time to wake the sleeping lion."

"More like the sleeping skunk," Scout joked, waving his hand in front of his face, "Don't ask." Engineer removed the walkie-talkie from his tool belt and turned it on.

"Did you hear the announcement, Doc," he said to Medic, who was on the other end with Heavy.

"Indeed I did," Medic responded, "Should I rouse our friend from his peaceful slumber?"

"Yeah, but be careful. We don't want to make him angry."

"On the contrary, I believe that's exactly what we want."

"Okay, but don't get yourself killed in the process. We need you more than usual right now."

"I'll try my best." With that, Medic turned off his walkie-talkie and turned to Heavy.

"Well, Heavy, it's time to let the cat out of the bag. And I'm not lion."

"You are very good at being doktor," Heavy replied, "Not so much at being comedian."

"Just open the door," Medic told him. Heavy nodded and lifted the garage-like door, revealing a dark room which was also the re-spawn room. A low growl came from inside.

"I apologize for this rude awakening," Medic said, "But we require your service at this time."

"Good," said a low voice as the form of a large lion appeared in the doorway, "Something tells me you're going to need it."

"And with the cows he had left over, Noah told a bunch of jokes which made the cows laugh and milk squirt out of their noses. Then, he used said milk to make ice cream, which led to the invention of the modern milkshake." Pyro happily applauded at Soldier's story, while Spy just shook his head, almost pitying Soldier for his stupidity. Almost. The four mercenaries (Sniper was there, too) were sitting near the BLU team's intelligence room, passing the time while Demoman was taking care of both a BLU Sentry and a BLU Engineer.

"You're right, Soldier," whispered Sniper, not wanting Pyro to hear, "History IS more fun when you make it up." Just then, Demoman jogged in from the Intel room.

"Alright, lads, we're good to go," he said, "Let's grab the goods and skedaddle!" The men silently agreed and entered the room, facing the blue briefcase that was sitting on a desk in the back.

"Here's the plan," Spy told them, "I'll take the intelligence while the rest of you cover me."

"Shouldn't be too hard," Soldier remarked. Quickly, Spy grabbed the briefcase and the usual alert went off, informing the men that it was time to run.

"You know," Sniper said as they ran out of the Intel room and toward the staircase leading to the courtyard, "I'm surprised that the BLUs haven't found us by now. You'd think at least one of them would've seen us sneak in."

"We didn't need to see you," said a snake-like voice from the far end of the room, near the exit ramp. The mercs turned to see most of the BLU team lined up with the BLU Spy in front.

"What do you mean by that, Napoleon Bonerfart," asked Soldier.

"We have some informants, unfortunately for you." BLU Spy gestured to the other end of the room, and the men turned to see Scout, Engineer, Heavy, and Medic being brought forward by the BLU Soldier and Pyro, both holding shotguns to their prisoners' backs.

"You bloody idiots sold us out," Sniper interrogated.

"Not idiots," replied Scout, gesturing to Heavy, "Idiot. Singular. Mainly this guy."

"I'm sorry I let team down," Heavy apologized, "but I had no choice. They…tickled me." The RED Team let out a disappointed groan.

"So what if you captured us," Soldier said in a snarky tone, "We still have our weapons." But when Soldier went to get his trusty shovel, he found that it was gone.

"Did I mention that I'm also a master pick-pocket," BLU Spy told them.

"Enough with the chit-chat," BLU Scout whined, "Let's kill 'em already."

"With pleasure," BLU Spy replied. The RED Team began to back into the Intel room, the BLU Team closing in. It seemed like this was really it.

"So," said BLU Spy, loading his revolver, "Any last words?" It was then that Spy noticed some movement behind the wall of blue, and he slowly began to smile.

"As a matter of fact," he began, "we do have some parting words. Did any of you happen to feed the cat?" The enemy team looked at him, obviously confused. "No? Well then," Spy continued, lighting a cigarette, "Dinner is served." The BLU Team slowly turned around to see a full-grown lion glaring at them, and had little time to react before it pounced. The REDs watched as their enemies' limbs were torn off by their secret weapon. When the violence had ceased, the lion was sitting in a pool of blood with a visibly full stomach, using one of his claws as a toothpick. The Administrator announced victory for the RED team, and the men cheered for both themselves and their friend.

"Great job guys," the lion told them, "What do we do now?"

"Now, Herr Simba," Medic responded, "We celebrate!" The mercenaries walked back to their own base with Simba following not-so-closely behind. Sniper noticed that he was lagging behind and waited for him.

"You alright, mate," he asked, "You're moving pretty slow."

"I'm fine," Simba replied, "It's just that I've never had meat that rich before. I think that last meal may have done some 'interesting' things to my weight." Sniper looked down at the lion's abdomen and noted that it did look slightly larger. Maybe a little round, even.

"I'm sure you'll work it off later," he reassured, "But for now, let's head back and have a rest."

"What the hell happened out there," BLU Scout shouted once he re-spawned, "We were gonna win and send those REDs home crying! But instead, we get eaten alive by the king of the jungle!" The BLU team sat in the lounge quarters of their base, reflecting on their loss.

"I'm not completely sure what happened," BLU Medic stated, "But we can't let it happen again."

"What do you suggest we do, then, doctor," asked BLU Demoman sarcastically, "Find a lion of our own?"

"Close, Demoman," said BLU Spy, gesturing to three separate crates that BLU Heavy had carried in, "Heavy found these outside while he was shaming himself. These crates are from an African wildlife reserve, and they contain what experts call a lion's mortal enemy." Scout walked up to one of the crates and read the details of the contents.

"What the hell's a 'highnah?'

The RED Team raised their glasses in toast to their victory, which was followed by cheering and slurred comments from Demoman.

"Let's not forget to thank Simba," said Soldier, "If it hadn't been for him, we wouldn't be celebrating."

"Speaking of which," said Engineer, "Where is he, anyway?" Pyro pointed to the door leading outside. Engineer opened it and saw Simba lying in the dirt looking up at the stars a few meters away.

"I'll be right back," Engineer told his teammates, and walked over to where Simba was lying. "Sure is a sight, ain't it.'

"Yeah," Simba replied, "I used to watch the stars with my father every night."

"I know what you mean, I used to star-gaze all the time with my kids."

"You got a big family?"

"Kind of. Just me, my wife, my two kids, and the family dog."

"That's pretty big."

"I guess."

"You know, my father told me that the stars are the way that spirits can talk to us. Give us advice."

"Yeah. You were talking about that earlier. Something about destiny. What are the spirits saying now?"

"Right now? Just to enjoy the night sky."

"That's good advice."

"Yeah." But Simba didn't have long to enjoy anything, for an extremely familiar smell entered the big cat's nostrils, and brought back frightening memories. Simba quickly sat up and growled under his breath, which wasn't unnoticed by Engineer.

"What is it," he asked.

"I've got a bad smell."

"Yeah, Scout said something about that. Called you a skunk."

"No, I mean I smell something bad, and it's not me."

"What, then?" Simba sniffed the air a few more times to make sure he wasn't crazy.

"Only the scum of the African plain," he said, turning to Engineer with a serious look on his face.

"Also known as…?"

"Hyena."


	5. A New Threat

Simba tread carefully in the basement of the BLU Team's base. The only thoughts going through his head were 'find them, and kill them.' The young lion regretted not telling his new found friends more about the darker parts of his childhood. He smacked himself for not explaining last night to Engineer about the smell he picked up. Too late now, he thought.

The smell seemed to go in every direction, making it harder to determine the location of the source. Just as he was about to give up, Simba heard a noise come from the basement's respawn room. The big cat quickly ran to the large, metal door, which opened automatically, and entered the dimly lit room. The smell was strongest here, but Simba didn't have very long to start searching for his prey.

"I must admit, you have excellent stealth skills." Simba turned and could barely make out the outline of the BLU Spy standing in the doorway. "I suppose that just comes naturally for you, as it does for me." Simba growled and glared at the deceiving Frenchman.

"Where are they," he said coldly, "I know they're here. I can smell them. What did you do with them?"

"I'm afraid your 'friends' are upstairs, socializing with the rest of my team. It's a shame you can't join us. Oh, and that smell? It's really just the smell of this." Spy held out a jar of yellow liquid that probably wasn't lemonade.

"They're not my friends. Far from it, actually. And...what is that?"

"You really don't want to know. Trust me. Anyway, whoever they are, they're going to help us win tomorrow's mission, whether you like it or not."

"You better believe I don't like it!" With that, Simba quickly pounced in BLU Spy's direction, only to be knocked back by his butterfly knife, which left a small gash on the lion's muzzle.

"Aw, did I leave a 'scar' on the poor kitty," BLU Spy taunted, chuckling to himself, "Now, you be a good _minet_ and stay here. Sweet dreams." BLU Spy shut and locked the metal door, leaving Simba lying in the dark, defeated.

The next morning, the RED team was shocked to discover that their ticket to victory had disappeared.

"Just relax everyone,' Engineer told them, "We've won plenty of battles without a lion on our side, so don't get your hissies in a fit."

"Well, what happened to him," Sniper asked, "He was here last night wasn't he?"

"Maybe he has gone out to hunt for small animals," Heavy suggested, "Seems appropriate for lion."

"It doesn't matter what happened to him," Soldier said, 'What matters is that we can still kick those BLUs back to their various homelands without his help. I mean, it's not like THEY have a dangerous predator on THEIR side." Engineer thought about telling Soldier, and the team, about what Simba had discovered last night, but decided to let it go, even though it bothered him throughout the day. It wasn't until the middle of that day's mission that Scout noticed the look of worry on the Texan's face.

"You alright there, Hard-hat," Scout asked while reloading his pistol, "You don't look so good."

"I'm fine," Engineer lied, "No need to worry about me." Scout was about to say something else, but just then, Pyro signaled for him to follow him to the BLU Team's base. When they reached their destination, Pyro explained that the BLU Heavy was guarding the stairs to the Intel room.

"So, you want me to go rough him up for you. Why, lazy?" Pyro nodded and offered Scout as much BONK! as he could drink as thanks.

"Alright, I'll do it," Scout agreed, "But I'm not doing it for you, I'm doing it for the BONK!" With that, Scout quickly ran for the Heavy, bat in hand, while Pyro waited and kept watch for any BLUs that might have respawned. However, it wasn't a BLU that got Pyro's attention.

An odd sound came from the doorway of the ramp leading to the basement. For a second, Pyro could have sworn it sounded like laughing. Curious, he set his flame-thrower down, walked to the doorway, and peeked inside, only to be yanked in by the creature waiting for him.

"Alright, he's gone," Scout said as he walked back into the room from outside, "Let's snag their briefcase and get out of here." But Scout was surprised to find only Pyro's flamethrower on the ground without its owner in sight. "Pyro," Scout called, "This isn't funny. Where'd you go?" Suddenly, Scout heard the familiar sound of Pyro's "voice" coming from downstairs. The baseball enthusiast followed the sound to the basement, and called for his teammate again.

After receiving no answer, Scout decided to leave and look elsewhere for Pyro, only to be met face-to-face with a creature he had never seen before. Scout's face contorted into a terrified look, while the creature just smiled evilly back at him.

"Boo."

The scream that followed was heard by nearly everyone, including Demoman, Heavy, and Medic, who were gathered in the BLU sewers.

"Was that Scout," asked Medic.

"Sure was," Demoman responded, "I'd recognize that girly shriek anywhere." Scout then ran down the stairs coming from the first floor of the BLU base, and would have kept running had he not been stopped by Medic. The doctor asked Scout what was wrong, but Scout only replied with a series of mumbled consonants.

"Calm down, Scout," Heavy said, grabbing hold of Scout's shoulders and shaking him like an over-sized doll, "What is problem?"

"I don't know what it was," Scout explained, his voice shaking with fear, "All I know is that whatever it was, it would have killed me for good if I hadn't ran fast enough!"

"What was it? What did it look like," Demo asked.

"It walked on all fours like some kind of animal! Its teeth were so sharp and white; I could almost see my reflection! Those glowing, yellow eyes stared right into the center of my very soul! And that laugh! Oh GOD, that laugh! It was the most demonic, evil thing I ever heard! I'm gonna have nightmares for the rest of my life because of that…THING!" With that, Scout collapsed onto the ground and curled up into a ball, rocking back and forth, while his teammates just looked at him, pitying their companion.

Meanwhile, Pyro sat in the basement respawn of the BLU Team, flicking his lighter on and off. Suddenly, the door opened and Sniper was thrown in the room by the BLU Soldier, who quickly shut and locked the door.

"Let me guess," he said to Pyro, "You were grabbed by a weird dog-looking thing while your guard was down." Pyro nodded. "Well, that's just great. Looks like the BLUs got some help of their own. Now what do we do?"

"Hello? Is someone there," said a voice from deep inside the dark room.

"Uh, yeah. Who wants to know," Sniper replied, a bit uneasy at the sound of the new voice.

"Don't worry," the voice replied, "It's just me." Sniper took pyro's lighter and held it near the back of the room, where Simba was lying on his side.

"Simba? How did you get in here?"

"It's a long story."

"Something tells me we've got time. Let 'er rip." Simba sighed and sat up, facing the two men.

"You know how I told you guys about those hyenas that worked for my uncle?"

"Yeah. Is that what those things are?"

"Exactly. Now, normally I'd just forget about it and let them do whatever, but not with these three."

"Wait, there's three of them?"

"Yes, and they're the reason that I came here in the middle of the night."

"What for?"

"To get rid of them for good." Sniper's eyes widened in surprise at both Simba's answer and the serious tone in his voice.

"But…why?"

"It's not obvious? They worked for my uncle! They helped him in killing my father! And as far as I know, they were closest to him. My uncle, I mean."

"Well, why didn't you kill them earlier?"

"I wanted to, but as soon as I took the throne, they disappeared. I've spent most of my life searching for them, but never found them until now."

"Well, how do you think they got here? The same way you did?"

"I assume."

"And it's the bloody BLU team that finds 'em first. The question is, why are they capturing us instead of killing us?"

"Beats me." Suddenly, the respawn door slid open to reveal the RED Spy, his knife dripping with blood.

"I believe you gentlemen are lost," he said, smiling, "Our respawn is in the other base." The two men and lion stood up in both surprise and relief.

"I never thought I'd be this glad to see you, you bloody snake."

"Did you…kill the hyenas," Simba asked.

"Hyenas," Spy responded, confused, "What hyenas? The only thing I killed was the Engineer."

"Uh, don't worry about it, let's get out of here." With that, the group quickly ran for the stairs, while two dark figures observed them from afar.

"Looks like those creeps were right," one said to the other, "He is looking for us."

"Yeah," The other responded, "Should we go after him?"

"Not just yet, I want to see how long it takes for him to realize that we're after him, too."

"What do we do about the others? They'll just get in the way." The first figure thought for a moment before turning to his companion.

'We'll let Ed take care of those losers."


	6. Hateful Hyenas

Soldier held his trusty shotgun firmly in his hands as he paced the RED Intel room, keeping an eye out for any BLUs or possible spies.

"Yes-sir-ree-bob," he declared proudly, "Working against my class description is going pretty well! I'm as good a defense as I am an offense!" The American turned to the RED briefcase that sat upon a large desk in the back of the room. "It's you and me, buddy," he said, speaking to no one in particular, "You and me." Just then, a muffled shout came from the other room, and Pyro came running in, only to be met with Soldier aiming his gun at him.

"Hold it right there, Charlie McGee! How am I supposed to know that you're not a spy?" Without hesitation, Pyro pulled out his shotgun and shot Soldier, who didn't feel a thing, as friendly fire was turned off. "Oh. Well, where've you been, son? Haven't seen you all morning!" Pyro quickly explained (in a series of mumbles and grunts) about where Simba had disappeared to and what was going on with the BLUs. "Huh. So, I guess the BLUs DO have a dangerous predator on their side," Soldier remarked, remembering what he had said earlier that morning (Chapter 5, look it up). "Well, who cares if they do?! I can take on a dog-sized animal any day! Bring it on, Fido!" As if on cue, a deep laughing sound echoed through the basement. "Whoa now. There's no need to rush," Soldier said, a bit frightened at the sudden noise, "Take your time. Or a rain-check, that works, too." Ignoring Soldier's advice, a full-grown hyena sprinted into the Intel room and pounced on Soldier, knocking him to the ground. "Uh, Pyro," Soldier whispered as the hyena breathed heavily in his face, "Little help?"

Pyro reacted quickly and air-blasted the hyena behind the desk and pulled Soldier back on his feet. It didn't take long for the hyena to recover, though, and it quickly pounced again, this time, landing in Soldier's arms. "Gotcha, you little creep," Soldier taunted, "What do you have to say about that?" The hyena let loose a fury of incoherent mumbling with spit flying in every direction. "Uh, I think it wants you, Pyro." Soldier quickly tossed the hyena into Pyro's unwilling arms, and caught it as Pyro tossed it back in refusal. "Aw, come on, don't be a baby! Put it out of its misery!" This led to a game of catch between the two mercenaries, with the hyena mumbling angrily with every toss. Heavy was upstairs enjoying a sandwich when he heard the odd sounds coming from the Intel room.

"What's going on," he asked as he came in.

"Heavy! You're just in time," Soldier responded, struggling with the hyena, "Catch!" With that, Soldier let the hyena fly into Heavy's confused grasp. The former Soviet chuckled as it watched the animal squirm uncomfortably in his hands.

"Is so cute!"

The hyena, not happy about being referred to as 'cute', grabbed Heavy's sandwich out of his pocket and devoured it in a matter of seconds before grinning mischievously. Heavy's face quickly turned from an expression of laughter to one of subtle anger.

"Okay, now it dies."

The poor hyena didn't have time to react before Heavy slammed it against the wall and held it there, his fist wrapped tightly around its throat.

"That's right! Show him who's boss," Soldier cheered. But before Heavy could land a punch, Pyro quickly intervened and told him to put the hyena down. Heavy did, and the hyena slid onto the ground, gasping for air. "What are you doing, Pyro," Soldier asked angrily, "That thing nearly killed us. Why do want us to spare it?" Pyro mumbled something, and both Soldier and Heavy's eyes widened in surprise. "What do you mean you can understand him?" Pyro held up a gloved finger, signaling for Soldier to wait, and got down face-to-face with the hyena, who growled at him in a low tone. Pyro then began mumbling randomly (at least it sounded like that to the others), making hand-motions as he went. The hyena mumbled back, and a conversation soon arose between the two, much to the bewilderment of Soldier and Heavy. Finally, Pyro faced his teammates and mumbled something yet again.

"Okay, okay! I'll admit that's impressive," Soldier began, "But if this monstrosity knows where his friends are, then we can still win this fight!" The hyena growled in protest, but Heavy took a step towards it, which quickly shut it up.

"You lead us to comrades," he said, "Or you die." The hyena sighed and silently agreed to lead the men to the BLU base. Meanwhile, Demoman and Medic had decided to do the sensible thing and look for Simba, keeping their eyes peeled for the strange creature Scout had mentioned.

"Ach, this is pointless," Demo exclaimed after searching the BLU courtyard, "We'll never find him at this rate!"

"Stay positive, Demoman," Medic told him, "He must be around here somewhere. He wouldn't have gone and left us without telling us, right?" Demoman opened his mouth to respond, but quickly closed it and began sniffing the air. "Hold on, I think I might know where he is."

"How so?"

"The smell, Doc. The exact same putrid odor was coming from Scout's room the other night."

"I don't see how that helps. It could just be Scout. The boy rarely showers, you know."

"True, but I don't think he growls in his sleep."

"Are you trying to say that Simba was sleeping in Scout's room?"

"Well, unless you can explain the hair on his sheets, yes."

"Well, where is he?" Demo sniffed the air again, and motioned for Medic to follow him to the BLU basement. Much to their chagrin, though, Simba wasn't there.

"I don't understand," Demoman said, "The smell is strongest here, but there's no soul in sight." Medic was about to respond, but stayed silent and pulled Demo to one of the hallways leading to the BLU Intel room. Demo was confused at first, but soon he heard voices coming from the Intel room that didn't sound…human.

"Still can't believe they escaped," said one voice, "You'd think this place would have better security. Probably shoulda nabbed that skinny guy I found snooping around here, too. For all we know, he's blabbed about us to his team." Demo and Medic looked at each other in surprise. Were these the creatures Scout had described?

"Don't worry about it, Banzai," the other voice said, "Listen, I'm going for a walk. You wanna tag along and clear your mind?"

"No thanks, Shenz. I'd rather stay here and sulk."

"Whatever." Realizing that the Intel room only had two exits, Demo and Medic quickly dove inside the hallway closest to the exit ramp, as the second voice was coming from the opposite end. The two watched silently in awe as a full grown hyena walked towards the staircase leading to the courtyard.

"_Mutter Gottes_," Medic whispered, "Scout was right. I feel bad for him; he has no idea what a hyena looks like."

"Uh, Doctor," Demoman whispered back, "I think you're missing the big picture, here: the hyenas can bloody TALK!"

"Perhaps they are from where Simba is from."

"Uh, Doc?"

"The question is, why are they here?"

"Doctor?"

"And why are they working against us?"

"MEDIC!"

"What, Demoman!?"

"Why don't you just ask him," Demo said finally, pointing behind Medic. The latter turned his head to see one of the hyenas staring at him menacingly.

"Oh, _scheisse_."

"Tried to warn you, mate."

"Well, look who decided to come out and play," the hyena taunted, "I gotta admit, you guys are pretty determinant."

"Forgive us for the intrusion _Herr_… Banzai, I believe? We're just looking for an ally of ours."

"Really now? What does he look like?"

"He's a two-hundred pound, blood thirsty lion," Demo answered, "You can't miss him."

"What a coincidence," Banzai hissed, "Me and my pack are looking for the exact same guy."

"You're looking for him," Medic asked, confused, "We thought he was in this building."

"You just missed him. Saw him walk out with a couple of your guys."

"Why didn't you go after him?"

"Timing is everything to a hyena."

"He must be back at our base, Doc," Demo whispered.

"Well, we must get back to him, then," Medic responded, "and quickly."

"Now, don't go just yet," said Banzai, "There's something else you guys should know about. These humans that look a lot like you, but with a different color, told us that if we saw any of your guys crawling around here, we shouldn't let you escape."

"Yeah, that makes sense," Demo said sarcastically, "After all, you're great at not letting things escape. Unless of course that thing is a full grown lion."

"That's funny. You're a funny guy. Think I'll kill you last." But before Banzai could do anything, another hyena flew right into him, knocking him back several feet. Confused, Demoman and Medic turned to see Soldier, Pyro, and Heavy standing behind them.

"Ha! Take that you malevolent mammal," Soldier shouted, and then noticed Medic and Demo staring at him, "Oh. Hi, guys."

"Ed! What's the matter with you," Banzai yelled at the other hyena, "Those guys are the enemy!" Ed mumbled something in defense. "I don't care if they threatened you! I threaten you all the time, but I never do nothing!

"Hey, Pongo," Soldier yelled, "Are you just gonna sit there or are you gonna fight?"

"Oh, don't worry," Banzai responded, "I'm not one to chicken out of a fight!" Both sides stood prepared to take action. It was to be a confrontation of epic proportions.

Man versus animal.

Skin versus fur.

Thumbs versus claws.

Brains versus-

"Stalemate!" Both the REDs and the hyenas were taken aback by the sudden end of the battle.

"Did we seriously waste that much time," Medic asked.

"Apparently so," Soldier responded, "Come along, men, let's head back to our base. We'll deal with these abominations later." The hyenas reluctantly walked back into the BLU Intel room, while the REDs headed back to the red-colored building they called home.

"Demoman," said Heavy, "What do you think happened to Scout?"

"Not sure," Demo responded, "Haven't seen him since he had that breakdown."

"Perhaps he is hiding somewhere."

Author's Note: Holy crap! My first author's note! Anyway, as I said earlier on my profile, there's going to be some slight shipping in the next chapter. So, be prepared for One: An unlikely pairing that probably no one will like, and Two: Some of my worst writing ever because I know nothing about romance!


	7. An Unexpected Meeting

Scout trembled in fear under his bed, the memory of that…thing replaying again and again in his head. No matter how hard he tried, the yellow-eyed, sharp-toothed creature never left his mind. He was doomed to live with the image of that horrid creature burned into his subconscious for the rest of his life. The sudden knocking noise startled the young mercenary, but the soothing sound of the Engineer's voice calmed him.

"It's only me, Scout," the Texan said calmly, "Just thought I'd check on you."

"C-come on in," Scout responded. The door opened and Engineer entered just as Scout got out from under the dusty bed.

"You alright, son," Engie asked, "You've been in here an awful long while."

"Fine," Scout responded, "Well, considering, at least."

"Good to know. By the by, I don't think you'll have to worry 'bout those hyenas for a long while."

"Why? Are they dead? Please tell me they're dead. Very, very dead."

"No, but the Administrator just announced that for the next few battles, neither team is allowed to use any of their 'advantages.'" Scout breathed a heavy sigh of relief.

"Thank God! Now I can relax."

"Yeah. Maybe you should take a walk. You know, clear your mind."

"That's not a bad idea, Hard-hat. You know, you really know how to make a guy feel good."

"It comes naturally, brother." With that, Engineer turned and left, while Scout pulled on his running shoes and headed outside. The sun was beginning to set when Scout decided to take a break by the bridge connecting the two bases. Personally, this was his favorite spot out of all the locations he'd been to in his mercenary career. It was quiet, calm, and somewhat relieving, when it wasn't being used for battles, of course. And Scout loved it.

The peace.

The calmness.

The serenity.

The-

"How hard is it to find some water around here!?" Scout turned to the sudden noise, and his face froze in horror. It was one of…them, emerging from the BLU base. In a panic, Scout ran for the RED base, hoping that the hyena hadn't seen him. Luckily, the hyena was focused on something else, rather than attacking him. Scout watched as the hyena walked to the edge of the moat that sat between the two buildings.

"Finally," it shouted, "Just gotta ease on down…" But in its attempt to quench its thirst, the hyena lost its footing and fell into the moat. Scout ran to the opposite edge to see what had happened. Down below, the hyena was thrashing violently in the water, gasping for air.

"Agh! Someone help! I can't swim!" Scout just stood there watching, and slowly began to smile.

"Are you kiddin' me," he taunted, "It's only like, six feet deep! Heck, I can swim in there just fine! Well, that's what you get for scaring the junk out of me earlier." The hyena didn't answer, but continued to thrash. "Say 'hi' to Davy Jones for me, you dog-faced freak!" With that, Scout turned to rejoin his teammates in the RED base. But just as he was about to enter, the thrashing suddenly stopped, and the moat became silent. Scout looked back at the moat, slightly worried, but quickly shook the feeling off. "Get a hold of yourself, Scout," he said to himself, "That thing is not friendly, so no remorse." Once again, Scout turned around to walk into his base, forcing all sympathy out of his mind.

Still…

Scout took one look back at the moat, sighed, and walked to the edge. The hyena had stopped thrashing, and was floating just beneath the surface of the water, not moving. For Scout, that was enough reason to dive into the moat, grab the hyena, and swim into the RED sewers. The Bostonian laid the hyena on the floor and sat down, leaning against the wall, breathing heavily.

"Man, why did I do that," he asked himself," That thing nearly killed me today. Why did I save it?"

"'Cause I told you to," Shouted a familiar voice. Scout looked up to see his own mother staring back at him.

"Ma? What are you doing here? How'd you get here?"

"I'm not actually your mother, kiddo," she responded, "I'm your conscience. I look like your mother because you want me to."

"So, this conversation is happening in my head?"

"Bingo."

"Boy, I really gotta take a vacation."

"Tell me about it. Anyway, like I said, you saved this…thing because I, meaning your subconscious, told you to."

"But why? That thing tried to kill me."

"Things aren't always as they seem, Scout. Anyway, I gotta go. Well, not really go, considering I live inside your tiny little head, but leave you for a while. Let me know how things turn out." With that, the subconscious form of Scout's mother disappeared into thin air.

"Great. My own conscience is talking to me in riddles. That's helpful." Suddenly, the hyena coughed itself awake and slowly rose, shaking off any water still on it.

"Jeez," it said, "I can't believe I survived that."

"You wouldn't have survived if I hadn't helped you," Scout said. The hyena looked at Scout with a confused expression on its face.

"You…helped me?"

"Well, I didn't really WANT to, but I did anyway."

"Well…thanks."

"Whatever." With that, scout began the long walk to the sewer stairs leading to the RED base. Suddenly, he heard the sound of footsteps quickly approaching, and turned to see the hyena running after him. "Cripes, what do you want now?"

"I just wanted to-"

"You know what? No. Just…no. I don't want to hear anything you have to say. You know why? Because you are the scum of the earth. Nobody likes you, you hear me? You're doomed to die alone." And so, Scout went on and on insulting the hyena through nearly every single domination line he knew. Once he was finished, the hyena looked at him, and just rolled its eyes.

"Pfft. If I had a zebra leg for every time I heard that, I'd probably die of heart disease." Scout's jaw dropped to the floor. Whenever he insulted someone, they either tried to insult him back, or didn't do anything because they were dead; no one had ever AGREED with him before!

"So…I'm right?"

"Kinda. I'm not that fat. Or mute. Or bald. But that whole 'nobody likes me' thing is kinda true."

"Really, that's gotta suck. Having no friends."

"Oh, I have friends; they're back at that blue place right now."

"Wait, there's more than one of you?"

"Yeah, you didn't know that?"

"Well, no. I just saw one of you, panicked, and hid for a while."

"Oh. Well, yeah. I've got these two guys that I've known for a while, and they're pretty good friends. And for the record, I'm not the one that scared you, that was one of them."

"Well, sorry for the mix-up."

"Eh. Don't worry about. A lot of folks say we all look alike."

"You know, I used to think you guys were evil, demented beings bent on the destruction of the entire world, but now that I've got to know one of you, you're really not that bad."

"Well, right back atcha! You're a pretty nice guy compared to who I've met over the years. After all, you did save my life."

"Eh, I don't even know why I did that. It just happened."

"Well, I'm glad it did."

"Good to hear. Hey, we've been talking this whole time, and I don't even know your name."

"You're right. Well, I'm not good with introductions, so…just call me Shenzi."

"Shenzi, huh? What is that, African?"

"Probably."

"Well, around here, I'm known as Scout. And back home, I'm known as Jerkwad, Dipface, Stretch, and some homeless guy on the street keeps calling me Jerry."

"Yikes. Rough childhood?"

"You could say that."

"Well, I'm no different. Back where I'm from, life is, and was, pretty rough."

"Well, I can imagine. I heard from a nature documentary that you guys are basically nature's Jerkwad."

"You ain't wrong, man. I may seem like a nice girl, but I can be nasty when I need to." Suddenly, the sound of Engineer's voice echoed through the sewers.

"Scout, where are you? It's chow-time, man!

"Well, looks like I gotta go," Scout said to his new friend.

"Same here. It was nice meeting you, by the way."

"Hey, you too." With that, Scout and Shenzi parted ways, leaving the sewers empty and silent.


	8. Road Trip - Part 1

And thus the story is set. Two teams fighting each other for control of land, with a group of African animals thrown in the mix. On one team's side, a full-grown, talking lion with an appetite for revenge. On the other side, a pack of talking hyenas with no clear motive. And no matter what happens, chaos will always be the norm…

The RED Team cheered when they heard that a ceasefire had been called for the week. Sure, they loved fighting, but everyone needs a break now and then. However, they weren't exactly sure how to spend their vacation, as everyone wanted to do something different, which led to several arguments/fistfights. Finally, Engineer called a house meeting to determine how they would spend their time.

"Alright, fellas," he said when everyone had gathered at the kitchen table, "I've called you all here so we can discuss the situation at hand like mature, socially-acceptable men. Now, does anyone have anything to say before we begin?" Everyone raised their hand, minus Simba, who was sleeping peacefully under the table. "Anything that isn't insulting?" The hands went down as fast as they went up. "Right. Now, let's go down the lineup and find out what everyone thinks we should do for this little break. Scout, we'll start with you."

"Well," Scout began, "I haven't really been out to the ballparks in a while, and I heard that there's supposed to be a game in town, so, I was thinking that we could go there."

"That's not a bad idea, a lot of us here like baseball just as much as you. Ain't that right, Soldier?"

"Well, it is an American sport," Soldier replied, "I guess it'd be alright. But if you ask me, I'd rather visit this new rib place downtown. I heard that the barbecue sauce they put on 'em is so hot, the waiters are also trained firefighters." Pyro let out a small yelp at the thought of a firefighter in a barbecue restaurant. He couldn't stand the idea of someone against fire in a fire-encouraging eatery. It just didn't make sense. "Oop, sorry, Pyro, forgot about you."

"Well, Pyro, what do you think we should do," Engineer asked. Pyro mumbled something. "A bonfire, eh? I remember setting up bonfires with my family every summer. I like that idea."

"You think that's a good idea? Wait 'til you hear mine," Demoman said.

"If it has anything to do with bars, drinking, or alcohol," Scout responded, "Then I don't wanna hear it."

"Then cover your ears, boyo."

"Scout's got a point, Demo," Engie said, "You always suggest bar-hopping when we talk about vacations."

"Besides, I'm pretty sure Scout's not old enough," Soldier added.

"Excuse me," Scout protested, "I'm twenty-three, old man!"

"I'm in my late forties," Soldier yelled, "I am not that old!"

"Tell that to the mirror, pal."

"Why I oughta…"

"Okay," Engie quickly intervened, "Let's move on before any physical pain is inflicted on anyone. Heavy, what do you think we should do?"

"I have no preference," Heavy responded, "I know almost nothing about baseball, yet it would be interesting to learn while watching, I enjoy ribs, a bonfire would be nostalgic in a sense, and a night of drinking wouldn't be too bad."

"Well, thanks for the input. How about you, Doc? You have an idea?"

"_Nein_, I agree with Heavy. I wouldn't mind doing either of the aforementioned activities," Medic replied.

"Okay then. Sniper?"

"To be honest, I'd rather not go out anywhere," Sniper said, "I mean, what's out there that we can do? Not much. Sure there's a shopping district, but in case you haven't noticed, there's a disturbing lack of women on this team." Everyone shifted their gaze to Pyro. "Er, relatively speaking, there aren't any women."

"As much as I hate to say it," Spy began, "I agree with the urine-flinger, I'd much rather stay here." It was at that moment that a sudden bang came from underneath the kitchen table, followed by a pained whimper.

"Ouch. You okay, Simba," Scout asked the lion, who was rubbing the top of his head.

"I'm fine," Simba replied, "I just heard you guys talking about something, so I woke up."

"We were just discussing possible ways to spend our vacation time," Medic explained, "Would you happen to have any ideas?"

"Not really," the lion responded, "I don't even know what a vacation is."

"Well, that figures," Scout commented.

"Say, I have an idea," Engie told the men, "How's about we go for a long drive?"

"Like a car drive," Soldier asked.

"Yeah, we'll just pack some drinks and snacks, hop into Sniper's van, and see where the road takes us."

"As long as we bring plenty of air-fresheners, I'm okay with it," Spy said.

"Did you want to come, Simba," Sniper asked.

"I guess," Simba replied, "I hadn't really planned on doing anything else."

"Alright, folks," Engineer said, "Looks like we've reached an agreement, so, let's hit the road!"


	9. Road Trip - Part 2 - And Away We Go

"Come on, come on," Sniper muttered as he repeatedly turned the ignition of his camper-van.

"Want me to check the engine," offered Engineer, who was sitting next to him.

"Not just yet. I've had this baby for fifteen years, and she's never quit on me."

"If you say so." Just then, Scout and Heavy came into the garage where the van was kept, each carrying two armfuls of drinks and snacks. "Nice job, guys. Just put 'em in the back with the rest."

"Okay, but be warned," Scout replied, "I brought a whole bunch of Bonk! with enough caffeine to kill a small dog, so don't drink too much."

"I wouldn't worry about that, Scout," said Heavy, "After all, you are the only one on the team who drinks it."

"Ah, good point." Medic was the next to enter the garage, carrying a red cooler as he went.

"Uh, we've already got a big enough cooler for the drinks, Doc," Engineer told him.

"Oh, this cooler isn't for the drinks," Medic responded, opening the cooler for everyone to see. Engineer had to choke back vomit at what he saw, while the other teammates just stared in horror.

"Are those…" Sniper began.

"Yes, indeed," Medic replied with an unusually large grin on his face, "Zebra legs. As well as most of the body."

"Okay, why exactly do you have zebra remains lying around," asked Scout.

"They were left over from a venture in Africa. I was going there to study Malaria, and I ended up with these."

"And why exactly are you bringing 'em along," Sniper questioned.

"How else do you plan on feeding a full-grown lion? Unless, of course, you were planning to sacrifice someone…" The others gave Sniper an odd look.

"Quit looking at me like that. I wasn't planning anything." A series of grunts and heaves came from the right side of the van, where Demoman, Soldier, and Pyro were trying to lift a TV.

"Wow, this is the best idea you guys have ever had," Scout told them, "Maybe we can get cable on this thing."

"Shut up and give us a hand," Soldier commanded. While Heavy and Scout assisted in the placement and setup of the TV, Spy and Simba finally entered the garage.

"What is this thing again," Simba asked.

"It's a motorized vehicle," Spy answered, "We humans use it to get to places we couldn't normally get to by just walking." Simba carefully walked toward the back of the van and jumped in. He trembled a bit, as he wasn't used to the feeling of the carpeted floor of the van.

"Are you sure this thing is safe?"

"Should be just fine," Sniper reassured.

"Aside from a few engine malfunctions," Engie added.

"Watch it," Sniper whispered in a low tone. As soon as everyone was in and settled, Sniper and Engie climbed into the driver and passenger seat, respectively. Sniper turned the ignition once more, and the vehicle sputtered to life, much to the surprise of Simba.

"Sounds like an angry hyena," he commented. However, the engine didn't last long, as the sputtering sound quickly faded, and the engine died.

"Ah, great," muttered Sniper, ignoring the smirk on Engineer's face, "Gimme a sec." With that, the Australian assassin got out of the vehicle and lifted the hood. After some tinkering, he finally closed it, and began to re-enter the van, when a sudden bump came from the trunk. Sniper ignored it, thinking it was just a sign of the engine working again, climbed into the driver's seat, turned the ignition one last time, and prayed for the vehicle to start. Luckily, the engine sputtered again and the van's dashboard lights came on. "Alright, lads, we're back in business!" With that, the van pulled out from the garage and began its journey to the main road leading to the small town of Teufort. "You know, it's been a while since I used this old thing for recreational purposes."

"Has it now," Engineer responded, "Well, looks like this was a good plan after all." The Texan turned his head to look at the rest of the team. Scout had already opened a can of Bonk! Soldier and Demo were trying to set up the TV. Pyro was just sitting in his spot, twiddling his thumbs. Heavy and Medic were discussing something about foreign affairs. Spy was smoking as usual, and Simba had gotten use to the feel of the van and fell asleep. "Aw, come on, folks," said to them, "at least try to talk to each other a bit."

"What's there to talk about," Scout asked, having finished his can of Bonk!, "I don't know about you guys, but I've got nothing to say." Just then, Simba's eyes shot open, and he growled in a low tone.

"What is it," Soldier asked, "Did Timmy fall down the well?"

"No," Simba replied, "I think I smell a-" Before Simba could finish his sentence, he caught sight of the Jarate jars on one of the shelves. "Nevermind…"

Author's Note: Hi, again. I wanted to apologize for both this and the last chapter being so short. On the bright side (At least, in my eyes), there will be another chapter with slight shipping coming soon. Also, I have two new stories that I'd like to write, but I don't know which one to write first. Then again, I might not write them at all. But if I do, which one would you like to see more? Option one is an Animal Farm fanfic which will be pretty lengthy (If I manage to pull it off). Option two will be a Lion King fic, which is something that's been floating in my head for a while now. So, feel free to let me know which one you'd rather see. Thanks, and enjoy your life.


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